What’s worse than gaining weight during a diet? Gaining weight during a pandemic!
When you try to make a lifestyle change but binge eat for two weeks due to the emotional stress of life as we know it.
That’s a mouthful but more importantly, it’s a headache, and my body has taken notice. It has commanded my hand to feed my mouth in the never-ending action of shoving chocolate and meat down my gullet.
Today is another day in my weight loss journey. I can’t lie, I’m stressed the hell out. To deal with the stress, I read tons of romance books, watch Korean dramas while feasting on a wide selection of chocolates.
I knew It got out of hand when I couldn’t breathe as easily as I did a few months ago and can’t quite shake this lethargicness from my body.
I especially knew my bingeing was out of control when I finished a 440z bag of sweet N Salty trail mix within two days. Google it. That’s a big ole bag lol.
I just kept eating cups of trail mix and whatever junk came my way. the lack of self-discipline is really embarrassing but nothing I haven’t faced before.
That’s not all my friends. I have a dirtier confession.
Last night I ate two cans of tuna and an ungodly amount of Quinoa crackers after scarfing down two tacos along with my scheduled quinoa dish for the day.
To make matters worse, I haven’t moved my body in more than 1,000 steps per today.
I tried watching weight loss videos for motivational purposes, but even I knew that most of those people on Youtube will gain their weight back.
They lost weight in an unsustainable way. Trust me, I’ve been there (lost 20lbs in one week) done that.
Like I told you before, losing 30 lbs in one month can be done, but can you keep up that lifestyle forever? Most likely not.
Take it from this serial dieter.
I let my emotions get the best of me and lost myself in self-pity. I know the right thing to do is to gain control of my mind.
It’s something that I have to conquer to live the type of life that I want, healthy and free from illness.
Right now if you’re in the same predicament, I want to tell you to cut your crap and do what you know to do!
We need the type of willpower that only comes from admitting the truth to ourselves. We’re out of control!
That it isn’t a lose weight quick scheme but rather the reprogramming of a life’s worth of bad habits.
We need to understand that we will suffer the setback of an undisciplined mind, but that shouldn’t stop us from still wanting better for ourselves.
I knew my destructive eating has taken a toll, but I was in denial of how much I let myself go. The scale said 198 lbs, and all I could think of was, damn, I never want to be in the 200’s again.
It was a really difficult fight to lose over 40 lbs. Now I’m two pounds away from ruining an accomplishment that I worked hard for.
I guess I needed to see the number to put things in perspective.
It’s a never-ending war but at some point, you have to be the general of it all and muster up your strength to keep going in the direction you ought to go.
I won’t allow a minor setback to break my spirit. When you see that I did it, you’ll believe that you can too.